home-sick

Back to norm is hard when you're used to being in odd situations. I fell into emptiness when I do nothing, then felt refuel again knowing I have God above to hold on to. Man how time crawls, it's ripping me apart to finally reach the day of back in my safe haven. Dreams are sweet when you're sleeping, turning sour when awake knowing they're just what your subconscious-side playing on you. These days I cannot sit still for lectures not even an hour, maybe I have attention deficit disorder, maybe. Ways to keep occupied, I'm back on my two feet, between those four brick walls, a racquet in a hand, a punctured rubber ball in another, an opponent across, it's really on, back like before; me and squash. Between times, it's nice to shed endorphines while sipping fresh evening air trying hard to finish few lapses of canal-tour realizing it's difficult to do that after all the fattening food consumed. Well yeah, if you still don't know, endorphine's supposed to make u feel fresh and happy. Or is it still not?

Other than that, studies' been really hard to initiate, feel like I've forgotten how to study. Final forensic medicine, epidemiology and ethics, and tropical medicine coming and why am I filling my brain with things unnecessaries. It's hard to concentrate when all u have up there is h.o.m.e. All these while I've been keeping it inside, ignoring the feelings, and when it's finally heigthen to the very max, it just came pouring and all I know now is I am terribly homesick. And it's tiring when the feelings turned into an anxiety form, knowing the headaches, achings, nightmares I've been having are all results of missing-home sickness.


Family album

I guess everyone has his or her own bad moments.

Mine's now.